. . .

I've come to this site more than twice before this thinking that I should post, and really, I do try. but obviously the amount that I am trying isn't good enough for me.
I could write a whole paragraph, read through it, and get rid of it only because I don't like the way I placed some of the words. am I really this picky?

sometimes I like how the time can go by so fast. but right now I don't like it at all. already it is June, and tonight my older sister is graduating. is it really possible? can it already be this far into the year? I don't like this. I don't like it at all...

I say that time is going by fast, and then I think about my age. only 12. only turning 13 in a little less than two months. only 12, and the tallest girl in my family. when I think of this, I think that time is going by so slowly. but really, it
isn't at all...

I think about next year's graduation, when a bunch of my friends will graduate. yes, I know. they are how much older than me, and yet they are my friends. I don't get it either. the only happy thought about them graduating is that if we take pictures together, I will be in a graduation gown too only because I will have graduated from 8th grade. and then again, it isn't the happiest thought...


now I wish that life would go a bit slower...and I'm afraid that it won't.

back to reality.

at night when I turn the light out and the room is completely dark, I only wait for sleep to come and take me away. for once I hear the click of the switch for the lamp beside me, I can only think of the many things that I still have to do. they bother me so much right before I sleep, and that is why I enjoy this time. for I dream of wonderful things. where everything is perfect. where I have nothing to worry about. and even though the dream may be short, it is still quite wonderful.
but then. it stops. I hear other sounds in which I did not hear in the dream. and then, I realize. . .


I'm back in reality. . .